Decisions

Today. What is there to say about today? Like any other day its a process. Another day in the week. Another day to make it....Just to get by! Decisions are made each day and depending on that decision, determines on how each day will be played out. Sometimes the EASIEST decisions seem to be the hardest to make. May not make since but its true. Its so easy to just walk away and be done with everything. Birds sqwaking in your ear....Snakes slithering around, hissing, telling you whats good for you but no one really knows whats good for you but YOU! Most don't think like that. They go to the ones that comfort them and wouldn't tell them anything wrong, but its a fool to do a thing as such. Though the ones who mean you no harm and wouldn't tell you anything to harm you mean well, those are the ones that will hurt you the most. Advice! No advice is good advice but your own. There for you have to take things into account and do them YOURSELF! That being said, i've made one of the hardest decisions ever. Yes its the right decision but the feelings one have after that decision is made takes a tole. Some cant and WONT be able to go through with it but in that you have to have faith. Faith in yourself to go out with that decision, and more importantly faith in God! So for those who are struggling from a difficult decision made, i say to you be strong. Wait it out. Good things come with those who wait. Believe in yourself and KNOW that you WILL make it! Forget about what others think and say because YOU know whats best for YOU! Be proud of any decision that you make! Take head to these words. Nurture them, cater to them, and love them. Smile about it and be happy!

~Trevon~

Enough

As the tears run down my face, i cant help but think, "I cant take this anymore!" The hardship, hurt, pain, stress, trials and tribulations!........knowing that i cant do this anymore. This lifestyle. These feelings. Living like this is hell itself. Crying because i dont know what to do, what my next move is. How do i handle things? NO ONE to help me. Help offers itself to me, body and soul, but deep down that help doesnt exist! That help is nowhere to be found. Crying.....Sitting here day by day, waiting for help. Is this the day that help knocks on my door? Is help here now? Why cant i move forward with my life? Why are there obstacles? Why are the ones that LOVE me and are suppose to be there for me arent? Why wont they push me. Give me that UMPTH i need to proceed, in the right direction that i need to be in, putting my life on track, getting my life together? WHY i ask you WHY? What did i do to deserve this, for you not to be there for me. Give me your love yes, but love can only go so far. Love can only do but so much! Dont you want to see me succeed? I cant take it, i have to do things for ME now! DESPITE if you're there or not, i dont care! I cant sit back and watch your life fade and fall like the pedals of a withered rose! Tears gone! My body tingles....i feel reassured! The presence of change fills me. Action takes place and im ready. I know what i have to do to excel! And by all means, life goes on. A cut down tree continues to grow, SLOWLY, over time. But if u have the intentions for that tree to no longer grow, cut it down to the stump and THAT, forever it will remain and i REFUSE to be that stump! I will watch you be that stump while i grow and branch away. Smiling! Life seems to be reborn and a new start awaits!

~Trevon~

Ready

Lol. Talking to you is like magic. When i dont hear from you my days are gray. Just the thought of you makes my inside smile. Then all the times that i dont talk to you or hit you up i would just think to myself, "I wonder what he's doing?" Then out the blue, every time, i hear from you! Lol

I dont know what it is? WOW! Just this second, i was thinking about you and

out of nowhere, you just text'd me. Amazing right? I know. Though i've known you for a certain period of time, like a flower, my like for you has bloomed. Prospered into something abstract. Like the making of a planet. SPECIAL! In a galaxy so big, transforming from something so small, to something unique in its own way. Having you all to myself, made for me,

for no one else to have! A new, just formed planet. Still bare and fresh, but growing.....

Ready! Ready for life to become of it. Ready to be used and loved and taken care of. And like this newly formed planet my like for you grows. Over time forming LOVE. Not luv but LOVE!

But like the galaxy that the planet was created in, that LOVE is big

which scares me because i dont know what to expect. Dont know how to move on, or the next steps to take so that that 'fear', that 'but', that 'what if'......no longer exists. And like that planet in that big galaxy we are indeed far. Which is the reason WHY i am scared. Leaving me to

wonder will anything prosper from this like? And if so what will become of us and the situation we are in? But then the sound of you voice reassures me of EVERYTHING! Making me feel safe, secure.....with that, i know everything will be ok so i open myself to you, ready for what the future holds for the both of us, ready to take the next step from like to LOVE, real love, opening my darkened adamantium heart to embrace your touch, our warmth, YOUR love! In that, i know.......IM READY!

~Trevon~

Mind Stroked

I want to be mind stroked.

Deep impacts in my mind, Thrusting deep intellect into my thought ducts.

Stimulating my brain cells, going awry.

Sensations running out of control, nowhere to go.

Trapped!

Doomed to go through and witness this process.

Astonished. Speechless. Amazed. At awe......

But yet at the same time wanting more, connecting to you as our minds combine as one, intoned with the universe!!!

I laugh at the fact that this is wild, crazy.....lol u full of shit!

But then im reassured by your psyche, your empathy!

Craving more and more of it, lusting!

Silence!

Both parties exhausted from our high, bleeding!

Arousal declining, bringing me back to this place where me and you are nomore, never alone but joined together with everyone else, this hell, this chaos......This world.......EARTH!!!

Rescheduling to adventure once more, both knowing that this, will never happen again....

Conversation!

~Trevon~

Trapped

Happy days come and go. Days like no other. Days where nothing even matters. Days where problems arent even problems, just figments of ones imagination. These are the days that every person wants. The days that mean the world and some. Days that where if u said the world was about to end, nothing would even matter because you're care free. Priceless days. But like the wind those days come and go. So quick and blissfully, taken away into the ether! Carried away across many grasslands, never to be seen or heard of again. Leaving any trace of existence. Once gone, those days, those carefree happy days, as scarce as they are become filled with darkness! Pain, stress, CONFUSION, hurt, regret, resentment! These are the REAL days. The many days that leave you blank, all knowlege gone. Not knowing what to do or what to think. Leaving you with anticipation, and disgust. Then hatred follows. The sight of that thing so happy and so filled with 'love' brings hate and fiery eyes, filled with eternal darkness. Leaves you drained to the point where you cant take no more and you just want to be done with it all!!! Let it be over, and NEVER look back. And there, at that very breaking point you remain, stuck, trapped in that darkness because you begin to feel a breeze of those happy days that reminds you of what a careless life is. The taste of immortality. So there you remain. To only go through that darkness once again. Now that darkness has a name and its called "The Cycle". So why do you remain. Because you are so use to The Cycle and the mind games and tricks that it plays, that thats the only thing you know! What to do? No one can save you, what to do?

~Trevon~